Through the Spectrum.

Chapter Two - getting help.

I didn't cry for long. Even if Josh wasn't aware of what was going on, my daughter Kenzie who was almost five at the time was very in tune to my emotions. Besides trying to be sensitive to Kenzie - I'm not a sit down and cry kind of girl. I'm a fixer and a fighter. Even if the situation wasn't fixable, I could learn and research about the beast who was taking over my son.

Information regarding autism was difficult for me to find. I had the newspaper article, and the few lines from my What to Expect - The Toddler Years book. Medical books had little more than what I had already read. Also, money was tight, so I didn't have access to a computer or the Internet. My father who lived on the east coast sent me a package of papers that he had printed out. I read everything I could get my hands on over and over again.

I made made a phone call to our local chapter of the Autism society. Twelve years ago, when I called the society, autism wasn't on the radar like it is today. The Autism Society was a small group of parents who had come together to help their children. Cathy, the president of the society ran the chapter out of her home. Speaking with another mom both comforted me and terrified me. She threw around so many acronyms that I felt like I was being served a bowl of alphabet soup - EA, SERT, ABA my head was spinning. Cathy was a wealth of knowledge, her son was school aged so she had experience working with the regions preschool services and the school board. But the best advice that Cathy gave me was in order to be the best advocate for my son, I needed to get real about Josh's needs. Our natural inclination as parents is to brag about our kids accomplishments. She told me that when advocating, yes be proud of Josh's milestones, but put more emphasis on where he still needed growth. She also warned me that the wait list for services was long.

Her warning proved to be true. It was a long wait. I think the first appointment was months later, at McMaster Children's Hospital for a hearing test. My sister in law drove us, and it was a surreal experience. The three of us were put in a sound proof room. I had never been in a room without sound before -the quiet was deafening. The way the test was carried out, speakers were in each of the corners of the room. The technicians in the sound booth would call out Josh's name from one of the four speakers. The natural response is to turn your head in the direction of the sound. They cautioned us not to move our heads so to be sure we were testing Josh's hearing, not his curiosity. Several times, in several ways they called out to Josh. Josh didn't respond at all, he didn't turn his head.

I looked at my sister in law. Oddly, I was happy that there was nothing from Josh. In my mind, his lack of response meant that he had a hearing problem. An easy fix with a hearing aid or worse case scenario, we could teach his sign language. A hearing problem seemed like a cake walk compared to autism.

Next, the technician chimed a series of bells in different tones. This time, there was a response from Josh. He looked up each and every time a bell rang. After the test was completed, I met with the technician. She explained to me that Josh had perfect hearing. How could that be? He never turned his head when they called his name. She explained to me that the chimes were all tones of the human voice. If Josh could hear the chimes, he could hear us.

Oh.

She suggested that we start speech and language services with the region. And if we were already on the wait list that we look into getting private speech and language services.

I didn't know how we were going to pay for it, but as soon as I got home I cracked open the yellow pages looked for a speech therapist. Preferably one who specialized in working with children with autism.

to be continued...