365 Project November 22 - 29

November 22 - Monday Crafts - On Mondays, it is my day with my little man.  Today we made Christmas trees.

November 23 - More Books -The trips to the library have gotten sporadic.  I even have overdue fines - gasp!  I just cant seem to get into a routine that works for our family.  In the spring and summer it was easy to be able to go every Tuesday like clockwork.  Now, in the fall, Tuesdays are hit or miss - and we are getting there whatever day works best. Oh well, just think of all the new books the library can buy with my fines...

 November 24 - Sunrise - Last winter, I went through a phase where I was photographing the sunrise from my bedroom window at least once a week.  Well, here we go again.  I just can't help myself.  When I wake up to the pinkish orange light beaming through my sheer curtains, it just makes me so happy that I want to capture it. 

November 25 - weekly self portrait - First Bit of Snow - The kids went nuts this morning when a tiny bit of snow fell.  I hope we get enough snow this winter to keep them happy.  And I hope it all melts by the end of February. 

November 26 - Loving it - I have been kind of disappointed with my last few book choices.  However, this week, I found a gem.  I couldn't put down "Once Upon a Day", by Lisa Tucker.  A sweet novel about family, and love, with a mystery to unravel. 



November 27 - Here Comes Santa Clause-  We went to the Waterdown Santa Clause Parade.  What makes this parade unique, is that it is held at night. I love a parade.  The marching bands, the bagpipers, the horses, the faces of the little kids waving from their floats - absolutely LOVE it!

my boys watching for Santa

every ones favorite float - Stewie, the goat from the Dutch Mill country Market.

Santa!!!

November 28 - Gummie Bears - These guys were left over from the parade last night.

November 29 - Kids @ Play - The Kid came home from a stressful day at school and played with her little brother.  Playing just makes you feel good!



365 Project November 15 - 21

November 15 - At The Park -The Little Man and I went to the park today, just the two of us.  Charlie has named this park the Spiderman park, because of the web.  It is a bit of a walk to get to so we don't go too often.  Watching Charlie master  the web, all the way to the top, made me realize just how long it's been. 

November 16 - Fall Wildflowers - beautiful in their own right.

November 17 - Soy Happy - It has been a rough few months here, and we are struggling to see the bright side of things and stay optimistic.  Looking for happy where ever we can find it.  Tonight at dinner we found happy inside the lid of the soy sauce.  Hey, I'll take it.

November 19 - Friday Night Rock Band - TGIF!  We couldn't think of a better way to end a long week than to rock out to the Beatles.  Something about pounding on the drums, and singing your heart out, just melts away the stress. 

November 20 - Rainbow Moon -  I was late getting to my 365 today, so I went outside to see if I could get a nighttime shot of something interesting.  Lucky me, there was a full moon with fluffy clouds surrounding it.  The clouds made an awesome rainbow around the moon.  For once procrastination wins!

 November 21 - There Goes My Baby - The laptop was kidnapped tonight by The Little Man.  And you wonder why I am behind on my blog. 

365 Project November 18 - What A Feeling

When I Was 17

The other night the kid was sitting in my room watching MTV's "When I Was 17."  It got me to reminiscing about who I was when I was 17...

  I was on the cusp of seventeen when I met my first boyfriend.  I remember getting ready to go to a New Year's Eve party.  I spent extra time getting ready, applying my frosted metallic brown makeup and matching nail polish. I did my hair, that year for a Christmas gift my father had spent $75.00 on a spiral perm (a fortune at the time.) I went to the closet and picked out my Buffalo jeans, my plum blouse with the military buttons, and my ankle booties.  I felt pretty, and I hoped the boy I liked would notice me.  He did, and we've been together ever since.  It's been twenty years, and I love him more today than ever.

Having a boyfriend, a person who thought the world of me, changed how I felt about myself.   His love for me made me realize that perhaps I was lovable.  When John and I were seventeen, we would spend hours on the phone each night.  Because we went to different high schools, we had our own space, with stories to share with each other at night.  Neither one of us had our licence and so we only saw each other once a week, usually Wednesdays and on the weekends with our group of friends.  That all changed when John got his licence and bought his first car, a 1981 gold Chevette.  After that, we saw each other more. We would drive around, listening to Nirvana, Guns n' Roses and Van Halen.  Or we would just stay home, hang out and listen to Lenny Kravitz. 

As important as my relationship with my boyfriend was to me when I was seventeen, so were my group of friends.  There were four of us.  At lunch time, Amanda would drive us in her dad's big black Cadillac to one of our houses.  There we would cook up Kraft Dinner, chicken strips, or chocolate chip muffins for lunch.  We would put on our parents old ABBA records (totally not cool, but fun) and we would dance and sing.  The four of us laughed a lot.  That's not to say that there wasn't some drama with the four of us, but overall, there was enough respect between us to make it work. 

My parents had split up when I was fifteen, and I lived with my father and brother.  Their separation was hard on me, and looking back probably harder than I realized.  My mom fell in love with another tman.  Her new relationship was abusive.  I struggled with how she could leave us and not her new boyfriend.  I remember my Dad and I fighting often over chores and what my responsibilities were.  It was hard for me to balance being a child with trying to keep the house and family together.  Seventeen is also the year that I became an aunt.  My sister, two years older than myself, gave birth to her son. 

As many sweet memories I have of seventeen, there was also a dark side.  By the end of seventeen, I fell into a dark depression.  John was there for me, and for that I am eternally grateful.  School became harder and harder for me, and soon after, I made the decision to drop out.  Part of me wishes that I could have stuck it out, but I know that my journey and the lessons I needed to learn took me on a different path.

I would tell my seventeen year old self to give herself more credit.  She is doing the best she can and learning along the way.

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Frank Sinatra - Always, Dedicated to Grandma

  Grandma has had a lifetime of loves and losses.  Her mother, father, sister, son, husband and her daughter all great loves that she has lost.  It seems so unfair that now she is on the verge of losing herself.

Like an unknowing, innocent child Dementia has taken her by the hand and is taking her down a road of uncertainty and fear. 

 More and more when I look into her eyes, instead of seeing the woman who I have grown to love and respect, I see the eyes of a girl, trying so hard to understand.  It's heartbreaking to see her try so hard and comprehend so little.

 All my life I've been a caregiver.  I have  given encouragement, love, praise, discipline, and advise to those who needed me.  Knowing that one day the people I was caring for would become independent - or at least that's the goal.  When  you care for a child, you can say to yourself, "It's just a phase, they will grow out of it."   Elder care is different, there is no growing out of it. It's harder because of the fact that with each passing phase there is a decline.  Independence is still a goal, but safety and well being start to be the greater need to be met.  The challenge balancing the two, with dignity and respect. 





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365 Project - November 8 - 14

November 8 - Retired - We've cleaned up the garden and somehow my garden stake has made it to the back of the house right beside the barbecue.  I think I will leave it.  It can only more rusty- right? Plus when the temperature reaches minus 10 degrees, I will hubby will remember summer days.

November 9 - Conversation Starters - I found this list of printable conversation starters at Quirky Momma.  They have been so much fun at the dinner table.

November 10 - Cosmos - In the spring of 2009, I bought a package of cosmos seeds from the dollar store.  When the flowers went to seed last fall, I harvested the seeds. I planted them this past spring.  Well, it has taken a while but my cosmos has finally bloomed - in November!  I am hoping it goes to seed again soon so I can continue my little science experiment.  This time, I think I will plant them directly into the earth and see if they bloom sooner in the season. - yes I know I'm a geek!

 November 11 - Lest we Forget - On Remembrance Day, I always set aside some time to think about the men and women that have given of themselves for our country.  You can't see my face, but trust me the tears are streaming.  The faces of the old men, who were just boys during the war - the innocent faces of the children watching the ceremonies, it is all so emotional for me.  Thank you to all the men and women who have sacrificed for us. 

November 12 - Little Monkey Man - Every year in the fall I do my children's portraits.  Shooting your own children is not for the faint of heart. I think that Charlie figured out that he had the power here.  I wanted a smile, he did not want to give it.  Look at his smug expression.  Little Monkey!

November 13 - You Say Goodbye, I Say Hello - Goodbye -It's a sad day when the trailer leaves the driveway to be stored for the winter.  There goes our escape away from the craziness of life.  Its going to be a LONG winter. 

 Hello- Well hello there shiny new camera!  No it's not mine I only wish.  I got invited to go camera shopping with my friend Jennifer today.  This is her first SLR camera and I know she is going to love it.  I do.  Is that a touch of jealousy?  Nah, a little envious, but mostly I am just excited for her.  Happy shooting Jen!

November 14 - Late Afternoon Moon -

monday mix tape

Just wanted to share some of what I've been listening to....

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365 Project - November 1 - 7

November 1 - Looking Through the Loot - The Little Man checking out his candy.  Maybe I am a bad mom, but every time he asks for a piece, I say yes.  It's better he eats it than me. 

November 2 - Rusty Mums - I love this image.  I think its the rusty fence and the rust coloured mums that both contradict, and compliment each other.

 November 3 - Night Rains -I both love and dread rain when we are camping.  Sometimes, the rain on the roof of the trailer puts me to sleep.  Other times it is like a torture treatment, one drop at a time, breaking my sanity. 

 November 4 - Weekly Self Portrait, Morning Silhouette - I missed my self portrait last week.  I had planned to get a shot of me a la Bat Girl on Halloween, but it slipped my mind on the big day.  I am glad I got one this week.  The self portrait exercise allows me to be venerable, and to reflect on where my head has been at for the week.  It allows me to get to know myself a little better.

November 5 - Beautiful Berries - After all the leaves have fallen, this fruit tree still holds its jewels.  Every morning and every afternoon that I go to the school to get the kids, this tree makes me happy. 

November 6 - Best Friends - The kid went to the mall today with a friend that had moved away to a different school a couple of years ago. They bought best friend charms.  Kenzie is the peanut butter, and her friend the jam.  Cute.  Not so cute?  She bought a package of Salt and Vinegar Crickets - and actually ate one (gross!) She better not complain about my cooking for a long, long time.

November 7 - Booby Prize - Poor little guy, the big kids went out today to hang with their friends, and left the little man to hang out with his parents for the afternoon.  It's not too often that Charlie will cry ( he is too concerned about being called a "cry baby") but when the kids both left, he started sobbing.  I gave him ice cream to cheer him up.  He made a point of telling his brother and sister this as soon as they got home. 

Halloween 2010

Pumpkin Carving

A visit with Grandma

Trick or Treat!

365 Project - October 22 - 31

October 31 - Brain Cupcakes -(more Halloween pictures in another post!)

 October 29 - Frankencans - The little man and I finished up our Halloween craft.  These guys look so cute and they were easy.  There is a Mommy, Daddy and Charlie Frankencan.

October 28 - Tea Time - sometimes tea is not strong enough.  Bring out the pink and brown pop!


 October 27 - Exploring - I went to a local park with my sister in law and nephew today.  The boys took off up the hill to look for coyotes.  Apparently my nephew is convinced there are a whole pack of them at the top of the hill "even babies"

 October 26 - At Summers End - The little girl who lived next door loved this trike, she has had to move on to a two wheeler since the seat broke.  Summer is over, and so too are the days of trike riding. 

October 25 - Monkey Bars - The little man and I baked today.

Monkey Bars
3/4 cup butter
2/3 cup sugar
2/3 cup packed brown sugar
1 egg
1tsp. vanilla
1 cup mashed ripe bananas
2 1/4 cup all purpose flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 cup chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  Grease rectangular baking pan.  In a large bowl, beat butter, add sugar and brown sugar.  Beat until fluffy.  Add egg and vanilla, beat well.  Stir in bananas.
In a medium bowl, combine dry ingredients.  Gradually add dry to wet ingredients, mixing well.  Stir in chocolate chips. 
Spread batter into pan, bake for about 25 minutes or until toothpick inserted in the middle come out clean. 
Let cool, cut into bars. 

October 30 - Ready for Carving -

October 24 - Trees in Fog - Sometimes when I look through my view finder, I see something magical, only to be disappointed with the image when I upload it to my computer.  This was the case with this image of the trees in the fog.  It still tells a story and evokes feeling, just not the story or feeling I had anticipated. Maybe that is the lesson, to allow feelings to flow, and not to anticipate them.

 October 23 - Painting...- The mini bathroom reno started today.  At first we were afraid that fixing the leak would mean a complete bathroom gut.  But we got lucky and only had to replace the floor, toilet, vanity and part of a wall.  We repaired the tiled wall by adding bead board half way down.  My job was to paint the board, before installation.  I love the way the bathroom turned out.  Will post "after" pictures soon. 

October 22 - Spooky - While the kids were at school today, I decorated the house for Halloween.  I myself am not a huge fan of Halloween, but my husband and my youngest son love it.  The little man was impressed with my efforts.